We got to thinking about the fact that we have handed out all kinds of valuable awards, but we have yet to pay homage to those geniuses, comedians, songwriters, and poets who have been the entertainment on our forum for the 8 months since this website began. Don’t worry; this is only Part 1. We have more awards coming than you will ever want to read about, and no, you don’t get anything except the honor of knowing you did something outrageous. Remember how we’ve said that things you say on MML will come back to haunt you? Here you go. Enjoy!
42DD Award - Em 33 - Who could forget what might be one of the funniest conversations to date on MML? Em33 was the first to take one of our seemingly innocent multiple choice forum polls regarding something as simple as how many votes an individual had placed for Season 14, Design A Dance, or who knows what else, and turn it into a full out guffaw-fest regarding bra size. For the sheer humor and ingenuity of taking a poll with such an innocuous beginning (and with choices only being A, B, C, and D) and really taking it into material that should be used on Comedy Central, Em deserves this award hands down!
Big Mouth Award - Azline Dancer – She may be temporarily out of commission, but she’s not forgotten. She is our forum’s honorary Big Mouth for having a record number of posts in the shortest period of time. How one person can come up with so much witty repartee is beyond us. We’re keeping up the nonsense, but nobody posted more or more often, and we love her all the more for it.
Why Not Confuse Us Even More Award - Distracted, More Distracted, and Most Distracted and their distant cousins Bemused and Distracted, Mystified, and Befuddled. These clowns thought it might be funny to confuse us with their user names, and the first evil spawn, Distracted, decided to take her name when we blogged about Tristan being a distraction. It ballooned into a User Name frenzy that still confuses us. Half the time, we think we are talking to one person when we are actually talking to like...12. We tend to lump them all together and call them the Distracteds, however, we're sure there are more of them out there. We just can’t keep them straight.
Trash Talk Award - Teal Ribbon. TR deserves the trash talk award for her walker and orthopedic shoes smackdown of Shakes during the discussion over who would get bragging rights to the dance lesson. TR is delusional because she thinks she’s going to win it, but we have to give her kudos for the suggestion that the walker be decorated with green sparkly glitter or something equally obnoxious.
The Pied Piper of the Dungeon Award - Ripley. First of all, Ripley is the quiet one yet she always seems to not only direct traffic to the dungeon, but she is also the ringleader for most of the mischief. It just goes to show you that you can never trust the Boss (and no, we’re not talking Springsteen here. We’re talking the one who came up with the original idea for this website). Keep an eye on her; we seem to remember that she suggested accompanying us on the road trip and driving while we leaned out of the sun roof singing along to Air Supply or something equally sinister.
The Waffle House Award - Acrobat Ballet- Lots of people who party all night long or work late hours always find themselves sitting at the Waffle House, and this is exactly how we picture AB with her laptop at 4:30 a.m. Now we know that AB lives in a different time zone but that woman must have insomnia worse than Shakes because she is on the forum at all hours of the night and early morning. She also is our honorary “keep the renegades in line” forum member because on the rare occasions that our administrators sleep, she seems to keep things going.
The We Wanna Be You Award or The American Express Award - Pattyh7n. This lady has lived, traveled, and worked in places most of us have only imagined. The only problem is that we don’t know if she’s nosing around Bray while most of us are here sweltering in the heat of the good old U.S.A. In other words, Patty, we are totally jealous of you and don't be surprised if you find us on your doorstep one morning with a bunch of mismatched luggage - assuming we could find you, of course.
Unsolved Mystery Award - KBRM - Of course we realize that people like to keep their private lives private, so we knew that when we started MML that there would be a hint of mystery from all of us about our identities. Not too long ago we had a discussion about the origination of screen names, and always in true form, KBRM opted out of spilling the beans on hers and it remains a mystery to this day. We explored every avenue trying to figure it out, and it looks like Sherlock Holmes is the only person who might be able to crack the mystery of KBRMs screen name...in other words... we got nuttin'. We might have to ask Super Spy 0014 to investigate because we’re clueless on this one, but we are fairly sure she is just doing it to annoy us and to get a few giggles. After some careful scrutiny and some early suggestions back on MML, we think KBRM stands for “Kinky Boots Really Matter." That’s probably it.
The Wee Smart Ass Award - Reformed Lurker - Not only is she a troublemaker who first called us “Brats”, but she is totally unapologetic about it. Yep, she always seems to find a way to zing us with her razor sharp comebacks, and most of the time we don't even see them coming, which is why we find it so hilarious. She also created many of our most memorable bumper stickers. Keep ‘em coming, RL. She’s probably some sort of Bumper Sticker Whiz Kid or C.E.O. of Bumpity Bump Bump Bumpers or something ridiculous, and we are just giving her an outlet to practice her Bumpity wisdom on us.
The Starbucks Award - Lily - Every so often a poster comes along and expresses so much enthusiasm for one person (in this case Tristan MacManus), that you can only assume that they've been throwing back one too many Venti Nonfat Caramel Macchiatos with a couple of extra espresso shots, as well as munching on chocolate covered espresso beans in between meals. We actually admire Lily's unwavering zeal and her lively, hilarious, and quirky posts. It makes us wonder why we don't have that kind of energy. Keep doing whatever you're doing, Lily, because it's working!
Honorary Permanent Dungeon Resident (while taking the rest of us with her) Award - StirredNotShaken – This quiet poster stirred things up in a big way when she said the Design a Dance Samba was a "religious experience”. We’re going to keep quiet because we know full well that we will be spending the rest of our summer down in that dungeon if we delve any further on this subject. Oh who the hell are we kidding? We get it, and talk about singing the Hallelujah Chorus when we saw Tristan dancing that Samba. Oh, and can we get an AMEN!
The Sherlock Holmes Award - Tingly Wink - Who knew that anybody really liked all of those hundreds and hundreds of posts on the ABC message board during Season 13 that your site administrators and some early members are largely responsible for? TW gets big hugs and kisses for not only reading all of that pure, unadulterated crap, but for tracking us down on twitter, (at which time, we said, “Get over to MML. STAT).
The Funny Caption Award - Cha Cha - This is for when we had our photo captioning thread and the photo was one of the Cha Cha with Nancy where Tristan had slid across the floor and was on his knees in front of Nancy. I believe Cha Cha’s exact words were: “Now THAT’s how you ask a girl to dance.” Yeah we remember lots of crap. .
The I Like To Stir Things Up Award - LL from DublinDown 330 – We were under the mistaken assumption that she was all corporate like, prissy, and straight-laced. Not so. She has caused more mischief than the rest of us put together, and that’s all we’re sayin’.
The You Convinced Us All That We Might Actually Be Able to Dance Award - Tristan MacManus – The Samba King himself has to get an award because he has convinced us that we will not only rock the Cha Cha or tempt him with our Tango, but that we will seduce him with our Rumba, mesmerize him with our Waltz, or, heaven forbid, wow him with our Samba rolls. Every single one of us who has entered to win that dance lesson is convinced we will be the future of DWTS. We are also all delusional.
The Obsession With Tristan’s Chest (hair) Award – SWAT and Acrobat Ballet - This award is presented by Shakes to these two who just can’t seem to get enough of the chest. Or the chest hair. That’s all I’m divulging on this topic.
The It’s Always the Quiet Ones Award – Pumpkin (the quiet ones are always the funny ones) -She posted the following on “You Might Be A Tristan MacManus Fan if…” - “…you have watched Tristan’s dances on you tube so many times that your computer is now rolling its eyes at you when you log on.” Now we don't know about y'all but that one is just so funny because it's true, and it came from Miss Pumpkin....or as Tristan would call her Miss Poompkin.
The Getting Down To the Real Nitty Gritty Award - LoveTheHeartthrob - We like the no-frills approach; not only does she have a user name that amuses us, but she also figured out exactly what to do in the dance lesson (no, she's not going to win it) when Tristan heats up the ballroom with all that, well, heat. She called it just right when she said, "It's hot in here because the A/C broke, but we'll just move the dance lesson to my place...."
Part 2 to come next week. Or later this week. Or whenever we feel like it. You don't want to miss it.